My Prerogative

In my haste to confess my faux-bad tendencies, I forgot to give The Federlines a tip of my Von Dutch trucker cap for their new arrival. Let’s all welcome Sean Preston Federline as the newest fodder to our celeb-obsessed media! I also want to give props for BritFed‘s restraint on the name choice: my money was on Sean Diddy Zima Pall-Mall Jay-Z Toxic Kiwi Fo’shizzle Bumper-Pool Federline.

Embarrassing Gesture of the Month: So far I’ve collected $51 in cafepress.com proceeds to be donated to the Red Cross. I’m thinking of something particularly humiliating as a challenge to you folks who are on the fence about buying that LL Thong. With that in mind, I propose that if I garner a $200+ in donation proceeds, I will dress up as Nancy Pearl for Halloween, down to the mandarin-collar blue suit and tasteful pearl necklace. I’ll even let Blake Carver vet my sales. AND post pixs of this tragic event if I reach my goal.

May god have mercy on my soul–but no mercy on your wallet!

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